Health of Řots’s King Bēserets Sot ‘rapidly deteriorating’

(Kotōlets/Nekkar, 5 December 2015) – Since this morning, officials in both Nekkar and Kotōlets, including prime minister Vervets Bekřa Nureet, have been seen running around more busily than normal and several obscured limousines were reportedly driving towards the heavily secluded royal estates outside Kotōlets. No official statement has been given yet, but according to unofficial sources the health of His Most Serene and August Majesty Bēserets Sot, Lord and King of the Lands of Řots and Emissary of the Four Gods, is rapidly declining.

King Bēserets Sot ascended the throne in 1961 – and that is the only knowledge about him that has been confirmed, as then prime minister Tip Verteř Ēbāt attended the ceremony and presented the official announcement of King Nařret III Tip’s death and King Bēserets Sot’s succession to the Řosu Git. Speculations about the King’s birthyear vary from 1910 to 1935, which makes him anywhere between 80 and 105 years old, old enough to make an imminent change of head of state likely.

The composition of the current royal family is unknown as well, and, most unusual, the name of the crown prince or crown princess has never been made public; during the reigns of the previous Kings and Queens, the name of the heir apparent or presumptive was always announced. The lack of this knowledge has made governments increasingly nervous in the past couple of years, as uncertainty about the King’s successor among the nobility could lead to a very old-fashioned war in the streets of Řots. “We cannot have unworldly counts and dukes holding unexpected joust tournaments in the busiest shopping streets of Kotōlets”, former prime minister Ēbāt Bander Mōr said already in 2003. Former prime minister Kar Basil Ītase tried to find out more only two years ago, but was unsuccessful.

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Former foreign minister of Řots asks world nations to recognise Goytakanya

(Nekkar, 9 November 2015) – Former foreign minister of Řots Koras Ipat Vabere has called upon the nations of the world to issue a formal recognition of Goytakanya. Suvuma expelled the ambassador of Neo Delta yesterday, following the recognition of Goytakanya by Neo Delta last month. Amid heavy riots, the Suvumese military escorted the ambassador off Suvumese territory in what is the country’s latest protest against the recognition by third parties of the small island nation of Goytakanya.

“The Suvumese government may think that other nations will abstain from recognising Goytakanya if they are treated as Neo Delta has been treated just now, but this kind of behaviour is really not done in international diplomacy”, the former minister said. “I therefore call upon all governments to recognise Goytakanya as an independent nation and force Suvuma to deal with the situation in a civilised manner. We cannot have one country dividing international politics and forcing countries to take sides only because it can’t get over the fact that one tiny Suvuman island gained independence forty years ago. The entire area could have been a lot more prosperous for both sides if Suvuma itself had recognised Goytakanya a long time ago.”

Only six countries, including Řots, have full diplomatic ties with Goytakanya at this moment. “Goytakanya has been independent for several decades, this number is far too low!” Koras Ipat Vabere says. “I cannot imagine that Suvuma has such a tight grip on the rest of the world that it is succesfully able to bully other nations into abstaining from recognising Goytakanya. This situation should change fast!”

The foreign ministry mentioned that it was discussing the status of Goytakanya with ‘several other countries’, but didn’t want to specify. Last week, the incumbent foreign minister Bāpēr Irve Ulař backed our neighbour Neo Delta in its dealings with Goytakanya and Suvuma. Koras Ipat Vabere was foreign minister in the second cabinet of prime minister Storm Bāvakos Nařret (2006 – 2011).

Vervets Bekřa Nureet sworn in as prime minister; Řots backs Neo Delta in conflict with Suvuma

(Nekkar, 2 November 2015) – After more than two months, the new government of Řots has been sworn in, with DP leader Vervets Bekřa Nureet succeeding Kar Basil Ītase as prime minister.

The most prominent member of his cabinet is Bāpēr Irve Ulař (f), who is mostly known as the non-partizan former director of the Urana Larin Kik-Institute, which specialises in foreign diplomatic strategies. She was accepted as the new minister of foreign affairs after a series of tough parliamentary hearings, which mainly centred about the diplomatic scandal that occurred in 2007 after the erroneous arrest of Neo Deltan diplomat Saran Fida-Pord by the military police of Řots; the arrest was ordered by the secret service in cooperation with the Institute, both thinking that they were dealing with the notorious art criminal Kulorve Břīvēri Tora, who often dresses up as a woman during the execution of art robberies and smuggling.

The reputations of both the Institute and the Řots secret service were heavily damaged by the incident and Bāpēr Irve Ulař had to step down. She then became CEO of the media consortium ŘīBak, and in 2010 she became Secretary General of the foreign ministry. The fact that Saran Fida-Pord is the current minister of foreign affairs of Neo Delta – and therefore Bāpēr Irve Ulař’s homologue – was duely discussed by the parliamentary committee but finally considered not to be a good enough reason to block Bāpēr Irve Ulař’s appointment.

One of Bāpēr Irve Ulař’s first tasks seemed to be the controversy around the recent recognition by Neo Delta of the state of Goytakanya, after the Suvumese Federal Republic, which claims Goytakanya as part of its own territory and considers the country’s government a terrorist organisation, urged Neo Delta to withdraw its recognition and threatened with ‘severe diplomatic consequences’. Bāpēr Irve Ulař backed Neo Delta saying that the Suvumese demands were ‘absolutely unreasonable’. “The Suvumese government has neither been able nor internationally allowed to assert its claims on Goytakanya and trying to make other countries choose between them will only further isolate Suvuma”, she said. The minister reminded that Řots has had official relations with Goytakanya since 2011. Although our country didn’t have any diplomatic relations with Suvuma before that year, it has proved impossible to establish them since Řots’s recognition of Goytakanya.

Other key figures in the new cabinet are Amer Sot Hulme on domestic affairs, Pugermba Ēbāt Brost on defense, Irve Tōr Verko (f) on finance, and Vurm Beden Břer on justice. Well-known television show host Bolko Avartse Arāp (f) was presented as the new education minister, a surprise appointment considering the fact that based on the opinions that she usually expresses on tv, a right-wing cabinet wouldn’t be the most logical choice for her.

Several parties in the Řosu Git (the parliament of Řots) criticised the Constitutional Court for causing unnecessary delay in the government formation. By first putting forward Bast Hulme Gabiř, the popular non-partizan Dakarevu Ebit (ombudsman), as candidate prime minister, it showed that it hadn’t a clear view of the political balance. A spokesperson of the Court however said that the Court has the right to choose anyone that it thinks suitable for the post of prime minister. “Bast Hulme Gabiř was and remains the Court’s first choice”, the spokesperson said.

Progress Party rejects Bast Hulme Gabiř as prime minister of Řots after a month of negotiations

(Nekkar, 27 September 2015) – After a small month of intense negotiations, the Progress Party (PA) has rejected Bast Hulme Gabiř as the new prime minister of Řots. Bast Hulme Gabiř, the popular non-partizan Dakarevu Ebit (ombudsman), was put forward by the Constitutional Court just before New Year. PA Leader Bekřa Upel Urana announced his party’s decision in the early morning, after another night of talks with Bekřa Upel Urana and representatives of the Workers’ Party ŘPP and other left-wing parties that supported the Court’s candidate, claiming that the PA in order to make this government work, had to accept too many ‘unwelcome policies’. “Especially the ŘPP have done their very best to promise us alternative policies to make accepting a government under Bast Hulme Gabiř more worthwile for us, but it just wasn’t enough”, Bekřa Upel Urana said.

This means that the Constitutional Court has to present another candidate within five days. It is widely expected that Vervets Bekřa Nureet, the leader of the Farmers’ Party (DP) that won last month’s parliamentary elections, will now be given a chance to form a government. In this case again, it will be the PA who will act as kingmaker; without it, the DP and the Feudal Party PP will be unable to find a suitable majority in the Řosu Git, the parliament of Řots.

Still incumbent prime minister Kar Basil Ītase (who will remain in office until her successor has been officially appointed) criticised both the Court and the political parties, including her own, the ŘPP, that the first round of negotiations has taken too long and caused the country to loose precious time. Although not the longest government formation ever yet, the current one has indeed taken more time than usual.

Constitutional Court proposes Bast Hulme Gabiř as candidate prime minister of Řots

(Nekkar, 6 September 2015) – On Eppezurta (the 4th day of the week, ed.) the election committee has announced the official results of the elections that were held last week. According to these, the Farmers’ Party (DP) narrowly won the popular vote with 20,23% of the votes, followed by the Progress Party (PA) with 20,15%, and the Workers’ Party (ŘPP) with 20,05%. The seat division will be as more or less indicated by the first exit poll on election night: Farmers (DP) 10, Workers (ŘPP) 9, Feudal Party (PP) 8, Progress (PA) 7, Republicans (PS) 6, Shared Possession (PBS) 4, Citizen (PD) 3, and Countryside (TDP), 1 for a total of 48 of 51 seats (but the three seats for the nobility are generally left unoccupied). It has been a first in the political history of Řots that the three largest parties ended up so close to each other (at least in terms of popular vote), which illustrates the opinion of some critics that people think that the current spectrum of parties doesn’t offer anything special.

It is perhaps for this reason that the Constitutional Court (Starmik Irtosuřēda), after hearing the party leaders’ advices yesterday made a surprise announcement just before midnight proposing non-partizan Bast Hulme Gabiř, the incumbent Dakarevu Ebit (an office similar to that of ombudsman or citizen’s advocate), as the candidate prime minister. The decision of the Constitutional Court was welcomed by several mostly left wing parties, ŘPP interim leader Lorvats Nert Ornte hailing the Court’s choice for an independent candidate. PA leader Bekřa Upel Urana said that his party will study the candidate before making a decision, and DP leader Vervets Bekřa Nureet (who was widely expected to be the Court’s candidate) outright opposed the idea of having Bast Hulme Gabiř as the next prime minister, although he didn’t want to elaborate this opinion. With DP and most likely also PP opposing Bast Hulme Gabiř’s candidacy, it will be decided by the PA whether this man will be the next prime minister or not.

No news will however be expected on this subject for at least a week, as tonight is New Year’s eve and as of tomorrow, the country will observe the five days of Onī Bakē Sirta (New Year’s Days) of the new year 3492.

Řots Exit polls: two parties battle for victory; heavy losses for ŘPP

(Nekkar, 30 August 2015) – Chaos in the political parties who have gathered on various locations in Nekkar (Řots) to watch the results of the parliamentary election that was held today, after the first exit polls were announced: DP (Farmers), PA (Progress) and ŘPP (Workers) are leading the election with a margin that is too close to call. Essential seem however the provincial seats, which weren’t up for election today: Farmers and Workers both benefit from two additional seats, due to which the race will be limited to those two parties as both may gain 9 or 10 seats, whereas the Progress Party (without any provincial seats), will probably stick behind with only 7 seats, even behind the PP (Feudal Party), which may get 8.

The ruling ŘPP suffered a heavy loss today, falling from 15 seats to 9 or 10. Prime minister Kar Basil Ītase addressed her fellow party members shortly after the first results came in, telling them that this result is unacceptable, no matter the final outcome, so she will step down to allow someone else to lead the government, in the event that the ŘPP still manages to win and can form a government.

Other loosing parties are the Feudal party (12 to a prospective 8), the PD (Party for the Citizen, 4 to 3) and the Republicans (9 to 6). The Progress Party and the Party for Shared Possession (PBS) re-enter the Řosu Git after several years of absence, and the Farmers’ Party increases its number of seats from 7 to 9 or 10.

Government formation will become difficult. Whichever party will win the election, they have to find support from other parties in order to find majorities (normally 26 of 51 seats, but in practise only 25 of 48 as the three seats that are reserved for members of the nobility haven’t been occupied for many years). The leader of the Farmers’ Party, Vervets Bekřa Nureet, told the press that anyone who can count can see that the chances for the ŘPP to obtain enough support are extremely slim.

As soon as the final results have been announced, somewhere in the next couple of days, the party leaders will visit the judges of the Constitutional Court who will then nominate the next prime minister.

Two days before the election, almost 50% of the voters of Řots haven’t decided yet

(Nekkar, 28 August 2015) – Today is the last day of the campaign before the elections for the Řosu Git (Řots’s national parliament) that will take place in two days. According to a poll, almost 50% of the voters don’t know yet for whom they will vote.

Nevertheless, a comeback seems assured for the once prominent liberal-conservative Progress Party (Parti Askandats), which lost all of its seats during the previous elections; it remains to be seen however if they will become the largest party, with incumbent prime minister Kar Basil Ītase’s Workers’ Party of Řots (Řosu Parti Paressevuda) seeming to have an almost equal chance to win again, despite some losses. A surprise may however be caused by the Farmers’ Party (Devē Parti), which could become the largest according to at least one poll and whose promise to deal with the increasing cases of human trafficking in Řots has attracted quite some support.

The main issue in this election is however freedom of education. Schools and (to a lesser extent) universities in Řots have to follow a rather fixed curriculum, which assures that everyone gets the same education. The Progress Party has argued that this is in conflict with the freedom of speech and wants to introduce a more flexible system. The ŘPP on the other hand wants to assure that every citizen of Řots gets the same basic information when they grow up, although curiosity to check the truth of all information should be encouraged. Critics say that this subject is too complicated for the average voter in Řots, which is why the Farmers’ Party (which currently has only 7 votes in the 51 member Řosu Git) is doing reasonably well.