President Sealy, Woolonia, declare war on Traditionalist Rebels after recent attacks

WOOLPORT- After another failed smaller attack by the Woolonian Traditionalist Rebels in Woolport yesterday and in response to the recent attacks President Ferdinand Sealy officially declared war on the rebels, effectively starting the Second Woolonian Civil War. General Reynolds Jackson-Hermett, head of the newly formed Woolonian Intelligence Task Force, was given full authority to be the head of military actions after Sealy’s previous personal efforts failed.

“When they went beyond armed resistance to attacking our leaders and those of our allies, they crossed a line. But when they went from attacking our government to attacking our civilians, we were forced to act. Today, the Woolonian Collective reluctantly, but firmly, declares war on the Woolonian Traditionalist Rebels and Sheep in Wolves’ Clothing.”

“I personally am not a military expert, and understanding such, I am surrendering the military leadership role to General Reynolds Jackson-Hermett. I have full trust in General Jackson-Hermett to most effectively and soundly defeat the WTR. Under him and his task force, in just these past weeks, we have collected valuable intelligence information to properly know how to act to defeat the WTR while minimizing our losses. I am confident in his ability and strategy, and I wouldn’t want anyone else in charge.”

“In every situation, our first priorities are still the security of our nation and the safety of the Woolonian people. Together, we will stamp out the wolves that threaten our sheep.”

President Sealy declined to answer any questions at that time, and did not address recent calls for his resignation.

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