Health of Řots’s King Bēserets Sot ‘rapidly deteriorating’

(Kotōlets/Nekkar, 5 December 2015) – Since this morning, officials in both Nekkar and Kotōlets, including prime minister Vervets Bekřa Nureet, have been seen running around more busily than normal and several obscured limousines were reportedly driving towards the heavily secluded royal estates outside Kotōlets. No official statement has been given yet, but according to unofficial sources the health of His Most Serene and August Majesty Bēserets Sot, Lord and King of the Lands of Řots and Emissary of the Four Gods, is rapidly declining.

King Bēserets Sot ascended the throne in 1961 – and that is the only knowledge about him that has been confirmed, as then prime minister Tip Verteř Ēbāt attended the ceremony and presented the official announcement of King Nařret III Tip’s death and King Bēserets Sot’s succession to the Řosu Git. Speculations about the King’s birthyear vary from 1910 to 1935, which makes him anywhere between 80 and 105 years old, old enough to make an imminent change of head of state likely.

The composition of the current royal family is unknown as well, and, most unusual, the name of the crown prince or crown princess has never been made public; during the reigns of the previous Kings and Queens, the name of the heir apparent or presumptive was always announced. The lack of this knowledge has made governments increasingly nervous in the past couple of years, as uncertainty about the King’s successor among the nobility could lead to a very old-fashioned war in the streets of Řots. “We cannot have unworldly counts and dukes holding unexpected joust tournaments in the busiest shopping streets of Kotōlets”, former prime minister Ēbāt Bander Mōr said already in 2003. Former prime minister Kar Basil Ītase tried to find out more only two years ago, but was unsuccessful.

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